Miley Cyrus video for ‘We Can’t Stop’ is the worst thing I’ve ever subjected myself to

She might not be able to stop, but I really wish she would.

I feel a rant coming on. So I think I need to make a disclaimer that this is strictly my opinion and all that. I mean, basically this entire blog is my opinion about news. I give the news, and then I state my opinion.

So…. when I heard We Can’t Stop I really wanted to like it. The beat is sick, and Miley‘s voice doesn’t completely make me want to rip my ears off (we’ll get to this in a bit). But really? The lyrics? I can’t . They’re terrible. The second verse in particular. Anyway, so the video dropped and I was really scared to watch it. I now know that my instinct to be scared was right. I want this to be known. I stopped the video at 1:15 out of 3:34 and went, “Jesus Christ I need to write about this it is that bad“. So. Here we are. Let’s get you caught up first….

I don’t even know where to begin. First of all, this is horrendous. It’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen. It is literally one of the worst things I’ve ever subjected myself to, and I’ve seen Human Centipede. I mean… I’ve seen way worse than Human Centipede but that’s a different story for a different day.

I still don’t know where to begin. Listen… I’m all for growing up and finding yourself. I have never particularly liked Miley Cyrus as a person, but I’ve always had a sort of respect for her. Also, I’ve always outwardly stated that I don’t think she can act at all and I think she’s an even worse singer. Seriously…. the girl can’t sing. She just can’t. And that’s okay. Do you girl. Grow up, shave your head, twerk all day every day. Here’s the thing though…. she’s a try hard. She’s trying too hard. How many times did she plan on shaking her ass to the camera and then showing us her tongue? I know it’s a music video but this is typical Miley lately. She wants to shed her Disney persona so damn badly that she’s gone way passed being herself and is now trying way too hard to be…. whatever this is. What even do we call this? It’s not hipster…. I’m just so. God the video was so awful I can’t even find words. Seriously I’m 10000% done with Miley and her antics. She’s officially the second most annoying celebrity at the moment. Right back there behind Amanda Bynes. Again….. what is with that second verse? Who wrote that? They need to never use words again. She even wore a grill. I thought everyone other than Lil’ Jon stopped wearing grills back in 2006.

There were dancing animals. Fake fingers getting cut off. People all of a sudden grab hot dogs out of a piñata. Someone shoves bread in their mouth (is that some sort of gluten attack? I don’t understand). I don’t even know what it is that I just watched. I’m going to have nightmares. In my own personal hell I’ll be at a Miley Cyrus concert. She’ll perform this song… and the performance will be this video. The opening act will be Rebecca Black. ….. ……. I’m going to leave this at this. This is basically a reaction post. These are my fresh feelings. And because I am so stunned by the entire thing I can’t even form proper words. It’s sad the way this all played out. Some parts of the song actually had a really great message. I wish Rihanna had kept it instead. Be sure to let me know what you think in the comments.

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